Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
