North Korea, Best Korea!
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize