She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
