drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
