My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
