I skipped work to stalk him.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize