You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
