So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
