But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Do vagina's smell?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
