so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
