The maid of honor just puked.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Randomize
