gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
