I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
We are two peas in an std pod
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
