We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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