I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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