well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
