I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
