so let's talk penis.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
