come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
and you said cock pushups were impossible
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
