i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
i need some magic done to my vagina
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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