No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize