Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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