oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Randomize
