sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
