Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
