I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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