I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I am naked and annoyed.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
