I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i just google imaged poop.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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