there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize