i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
My bed smells like the plague
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