he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
They have beer where we have blood.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
