Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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