I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize