That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
