my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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