I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize