I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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