hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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