I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
