Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
