just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
she looked like the before picture.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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