ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Mom said you looked used
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
