The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
