She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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