dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
