Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
