I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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