we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
