We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Randomize
