My first STD was from a foam party
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
