i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
